Give and Take
An insight into how helping others drives our own success.
Summary of 7 Key Points
Key Points
- The reciprocity styles: givers, takers, and matchers
- Success of givers in the long run
- The power of weak ties
- The ripple effect of giving behavior
- Practical strategies for becoming an otherish giver
- Overcoming the doormat effect as a giver
- Creating a culture of giving in organizations
key point 1 of 7
The reciprocity styles: givers, takers, and matchers
Reciprocity styles are distinct patterns of behavior that individuals exhibit when interacting with others in society or within organizational structures. In these interactions, people typically adopt one of three primary reciprocity styles: givers, takers, or matchers. Givers are those who contribute to others without expecting anything in return. They are driven by a sense of altruism and a desire to help others succeed. Givers tend to prioritize the interests and needs of others, often at a personal cost. They are likely to offer their time, resources, and support generously, and they enjoy the satisfaction that comes from aiding others…Read&Listen More
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Success of givers in the long run
In the book, the perspective on the success of givers in the long run is that individuals who are ‘givers’—those who contribute to others without expecting anything in return—can achieve extraordinary results and success over time. The author challenges the common assumption that takers, who aim to get as much as possible from others, are the most successful. Instead, it is highlighted that givers, through their style of consistently helping others, can build better relationships, reputations, and networks, which in the long run, compound their own success…Read&Listen More
key point 3 of 7
The power of weak ties
The concept of ‘weak ties’ refers to relationships with people who are not closely bonded to an individual, such as acquaintances rather than close friends or family. In ‘Give and Take’, it is highlighted that these weak ties can actually be more valuable for networking, job opportunities, and gathering unique information compared to strong ties. This is primarily because weak ties provide access to a broader range of resources and information, which is not available within one’s immediate circle of close contacts. Strong ties, while important for emotional support, often circulate the same ideas and opportunities, leading to an ‘echo chamber’ effect…Read&Listen More
key point 4 of 7
The ripple effect of giving behavior
The concept of giving behavior creating a ripple effect is rooted in the idea that our actions, especially those based on generosity and selflessness, can influence others in a broader social context. Giving behavior encompasses not just material contributions but also involves sharing time, expertise, and support with others without the expectation of immediate personal gain. When an individual engages in giving, it can inspire observers and recipients to act similarly, thereby setting off a chain reaction of generosity and kindness…Read&Listen More
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Practical strategies for becoming an otherish giver
The concept of ‘otherish giving’ refers to the balance between being generous and self-interested, ensuring that while helping others, one also considers their own needs. The author elucidates that otherish givers are individuals who provide support to others in a way that is not only altruistic but also strategic, allowing them to sustain their giving over time. This perspective contrasts with ‘selfless givers,’ who risk burnout by not safeguarding their own interests, and ‘takers,’ who primarily seek to maximize their own benefits at the expense of others…Read&Listen More
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Overcoming the doormat effect as a giver
Overcoming the doormat effect as a giver involves recognizing that being a selfless giver can lead to exploitation and burnout. It’s essential for givers to learn how to set boundaries, advocate for themselves, and strategically offer their assistance. The doormat effect occurs when givers fail to assert their own needs and become overloaded with the needs of others, leading to a decrease in their own success and well-being…Read&Listen More
key point 7 of 7
Creating a culture of giving in organizations
In the exploration of how a culture of giving can be fostered within organizations, the text emphasizes that leaders play a pivotal role in setting the tone. It posits that when leaders act as role models who prioritize the welfare of their team members and the broader organization over their individual gains, they establish a precedent. This behavior encourages others within the organization to emulate this giving mindset. The idea is that when leaders give their time, resources, and energy without expecting immediate reciprocation, they cultivate an environment where collaboration, support, and mutual aid become the norm, rather than the exception…Read&Listen More